Sweet Pizza

So have you seen Domino's has a new Oreo Dessert Pizza? 'Fraid I'm not making this up.

(Not sure I even need to say this, but...) Does this thing really need to exist? Domino's rocked my innocent, cookie pizza-free world last week by sending a graphic flyer in the mail. Oreo meet pizza. Pizza meet Oreo. Finger meet throat.

My first reaction to this Oreo concoction was the same as my second and third: Disgusting. My next cogitation was that it's a symptom of American excess and a surefire source of obesity. Then I thought, I'd sure like to try one.

Alas, for the good of the country, I've resisted ordering it. Since there's no trace of the Oreo pizza on Domino's Web site, I'd guess they're not committed to it. Heck, even Domino's brownies get prominent Web real estate complete with a mascot, Fudgems.

Since I refuse to get one (college age and twenty-something readers, please report your findings here), I made a little research call to my local Domino's. The helpful employee informed me that the dessert is a 1o-inch, thin crust pizza base topped with chocolate pudding, real Oreos and white icing. But, he warned, "It's very, very sweet. If you can't stand sweet stuff, then stay away from it. It's good, but I can't eat it because I've got bad teeth. " So can you, for just $4.99!

The idea of a dessert atop regular pizza dough is unappealing, but not surprising. Apparently having side orders like Cheezy Bread, Cinna Stix and Breadsticks just didn't cut it for Domino's. In addition to further harpooning Americans' terminally ill speling (<--a joke), the Michigan-based company feels we need another bread-based calorie source.

But this Oreo dessert is likely to work, as Americans are certainly pizza crazy. Then again, so's the rest of the globe. Let's just hope the Oreo Pizza doesn't become our latest export--we owe the world that much.

As I'm writing this--on Sunday, with a football game broadcast in the background--the Oreo Pizza commercial just came on. Still disgusted. (Put down the phone, JB! Hold firm.)